


Complicated

by Cow_ard_Me



Category: 9-1-1: Lone Star (TV 2020)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-08
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-13 18:07:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,735
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29282733
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cow_ard_Me/pseuds/Cow_ard_Me
Summary: A little something that I needed to write after watching the trailer for 2x04 and almost losing my mind worrying about producers, writers, or whatever, ruining another one of my ships.
Relationships: Carlos Reyes/TK Strand
Comments: 1
Kudos: 75





	Complicated

He had been so scared when the AFD had been there trying to control the wildfire. He knew it was bad, but how bad was it if units from other states were coming over to help out? He knew he sounded like such a hypocrite; he also worked a high-risk job, but he had never feared for his life the way he had feared for TK’s that day.

Was fire more uncontrollable than stupid people carrying guns or anything else dumb that criminals got up to? He wasn’t sure there was any way to compare which of their jobs carried more risk, and it wasn’t a contest anyway. He understood, though, that it was harder being the on the sidelines when the person you cared for so much was out there putting his life at risk, and there was nothing you could do to help because your skills set was not needed for the situation at hand.

On top of that, it hadn’t been that long ago that TK had been on a hospital bed fighting for his life. Life was unpredictable that way; Carlos was the one who carried a gun and TK had been the one getting a bullet to the chest while responding to a call. Talk about ironies!

Carlos Reyes knew fear. He’d known fear since he was a child, but he’d learned to face it and overcome it. He considered himself a brave man in many aspects and in many ways, yet there were facets of his life where he lacked courage. He had convinced himself that the way he’d been managing certain parts of his life was the best he could do, but was it? Was he being respectful and a ‘good son’ or was he just being a coward?

Opening the door of his apartment and seeing TK on the other side filled Carlos with incredible dread. TK didn’t look angry, which was what Carlos had expected in a way; TK looked confused and, what was worse, he looked hurt. Carlos had brought up that hurt; he had hurt TK when that was the last thing he had wanted. TK had been hurt in the past, terribly hurt; Carlos had never wanted to be the cause of TK’s pain, and still here they were.

He didn’t know what to say. He had spent hours thinking about how to confront the situation with TK, what to say to explain what had happened, and he had no idea yet of what was the best way to approach the mess he’d created. The more they stayed there without talking, the worse Carlos felt and the more dread that filled him, which was why he just blurted out, “Are we breaking up?”

Carlos hadn’t believed it was possible, but TK looked even more heartbroken when he listened to what Carlos had said. TK just shook his head and walked past him into the house.

“You didn’t tell your parents I was your boyfriend?” TK asked with all the confusion that was to be expected under the circumstances. And he just sat down heavily on the ottoman looking at Carlos, waiting for an explanation.

TK deserved an explanation, of course he did. Carlos just didn’t know what to say, how to start. He himself didn’t understand how he’d gotten to this place. He knew why this had started and why he had agreed to it, but even now he wondered if it was worth it.

“I mean, I should have known…” TK got up and started pacing in front of him. He just had too much anxious energy to remain seated; he always had so much energy–that was one of the many things Carlos loved about him. “…every time I brought up the idea of meeting your parents, you just ignored the topic.” He suddenly stopped in front of him and looked him straight in the eye. “I’m such an idiot.” He shook his head again. “There I was rebuffing someone else’s advances days ago because I have a boyfriend and it’s quite serious…” Then, he laughed without humor. “The joke’s on me, I guess…”

TK stopped talking there. Carlos knew he hadn’t tired himself out just yet; he was waiting for any kind of reply. Carlos didn’t know how to reply; he was dying to ask, ‘Who the hell was hitting on you and why am I just learning about it now?’ However, He knew he had no right to ask that–TK was not his property–and he sure as hell couldn’t ask that now; it would just stock the fire even more.

TK seemed to get tired of waiting for him to comment, to say anything at all really. He just sighed heavily and turned towards the door, he stopped in front of it without opening it. “After a day trying to make sense of yesterday’s really awkward meeting with your parents and just driving myself crazy, I thought I should come and see if I could get some clarity.” He turned his head to look at Carlos and said brokenly, “What are we? Are we even a ‘we’?” That said, he reached for the door knob and turned it.

TK throwing his own words back at him was his complete and absolute undoing. Carlos reached out and took hold of TK’s wrist. “Ty, I’m sorry. Please, don’t go. Let’s talk.”

TK was not happy; how could he be? Still, he sat down again on the ottoman and Carlos sat down on one of the armchairs facing him. “It’s complicated, Ty.” He tried to reach for one TK’s hands, but TK just linked his hands together and looked at him, waiting. Carlos knew he didn’t deserve it, but TK was giving a chance to explain; there was not much to explain, he had to try though. “They know. They know who you are, or at least they suspect it.”

TK frowned deeply. Carlos was aware he had to expand on that. “Being gay in Texas is not easy, not when your family has had Texan roots for generations. I knew I didn’t want to hide who I am since I quite was young, so I came out to my parents when I was 17 and about to finish high school.” He closed his eyes at the memory; that hadn’t been an easy talk. “It was hard for my parents; mom came around way faster than dad. As I was about to leave my house for college, he came to me and said he didn’t understand my choices, but he wanted me to be happy, so I could go and live my life as I so fit, but he never wanted my lifestyle rubbed on his face.” He sighed; it was hard that he couldn’t share his whole happiness with his family, but at least he got to live his truth.

He saw the moment TK’s anger was turning into understanding–his face softened. He didn’t say anything; he was probably waiting for Carlos to get everything out. “So, that’s what I’ve done for years; I’ve lived my life and not included my parents in the romantic part of it. Not that there’s been that much romance…” He lingered there.

TK snorted a little. Carlos knew he was most likely thinking back to when Carlos said to him in this very house, ‘I don’t do this a lot.’ TK had just replied, ‘Clearly.’ Carlos reached out again for TK’s hands and this time TK didn’t pull back and let him wrap their hands together. 

“I’m sorry I didn’t talk to you about this before. Your dad is so accepting and welcoming; it’s nice to feel like you belong, and I wish…” Carlos was about to sob. TK took his cheek into one of his hands and brought his eyes up to look him straight on. “I wish I could introduce you to my family as my boyfriend. I wish you could eat my mom’s food–she’s a much better cook than I am.” He felt so loved when he heard TK murmur, ‘I doubt that very much.’ He finally let a sob get out of his chest. “I just wish so many things…”

TK embraced him and whisper into his ear, “I’m sorry for reacting without knowing the whole story.” He rubbed Carlo’s back softly and lovingly. “I’m sorry you have to compartmentalize your life for your family, but now I understand why you do.” TK kissed away the few tears that had escaped Carlos’ eyes. “I wish you didn’t have to, but I’m so grateful you’ve chosen to be you, even if it’s got to be far away from them.” TK pulled away to look at him again. “They’re the ones missing out, babe. They’ve made their choices and you’ve made yours. Maybe they’ll come around someday, or maybe they won’t, but please keep in mind that they’re the ones who are missing out.”

TK pressed a soft kiss to Carlos’ lips. “You’re a wonderful cook and have all recipes. I’ve never tried you mom’s cooking, so I don’t really know what I’m missing, so it’s all good. We’re all good.”

They both laughed at that. TK wanted to lift his spirits and he did just that. Yeah, life was complicated sometimes, but it didn’t always have to be. Carlos should have known to talk to TK openly and honestly about this before; he should have known that TK would understand–TK is his father’s son in so many ways. Carlos could have avoided hurting TK’s feelings when introducing him as ‘a friend’ to his folks. Hypotheticals aside, he was so grateful TK had come over and given him a chance to explain.

Carlos had known fear, he had known dread, he had known rejection, he had known sadness and a feeling of unfulfillment that he hated, but he hadn’t known understanding or forgiveness or love the way he did now. TK didn’t know how much healing he had brought to Carlos’ life by just existing and being. He would tell him, even better he would show him. Carlos was not going to complicate his life more than it had been made complex by others. He loved his parents, but he had been choosing his own happiness for years. He would continue choosing it by holding on to the people who loved him for all of who he was.

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you think.
> 
> I struggled a lot with whether or not to create my 'own explanation' to that 'introduction' on the trailer, but I didn't want this to be too vague.


End file.
